I've mentioned before that my original intent was that blog would be
something more than simply an
episode-by-episode-analysis-slash-product-placement-catalogue; my original goal
was to write more personal reflections and observations about the TV show that
has meant so much to me. So here goes.
My wife of seven years and I have separated. For the past three months I've been holed up
in a 30-foot RV deep in the wilds of Boring, Oregon (okay, it’s actually an RV
park, but it’s pretty secluded for this city-dweller). It’s actually a pretty sweet setup: I've got my 42” 3D TV, my PS3, turntable and
vinyl collection, 5.1 surround sound and a healthy selection of my blu-ray/DVD
collection on hand (the rest of the collection resides in my Oregon City
storage unit, where it is easily accessed five days a week). Laundry facilities are just a few steps
away. The commute to and from work
sucks, but it’s manageable.
It sounds somewhat ideal for an antisocial type like me… but somehow
it’s been pretty miserable. I’m utterly
and completely alone out here. No wife,
no kids, no dogs…. Just me, and the nocturnal clatter of various forest insects
and critters, and the occasional spate of rain that batters the thin roof overhead
like an onslaught of bullets.
This is my life in the shadow of The Twilight Zone. I am Serling’s isolated man, crushed beneath
circumstances he can’t control (but likely brought on himself), despairing for
human contact, cracking under the strain of loneliness. I am Mike Ferris, wandering through an empty
town. I am James Corey, suffering
through a life sentence on an asteroid. I
am Captain James Embry, frantically searching for his lost crew in a sweltering
desert.
Have I sufficiently driven my point home? I’m fucking lonely. After spending the first two months in a deep
depression, I've started taking steps to improve my health, both physical and
mental: I've recently joined a gym, I’m
watching my calories, I've dramatically reduced my alcohol intake, and I’m
starting to level out emotionally thanks to the antidepressant my doctor has
prescribed. I've lost about 20 pounds so
far and my outlook is gradually brightening.
So anyway, that’s where I've been (if anybody was wondering about the
lack of blogging lately). As for the
wife situation ---- I dunno, man.
Depends on the day, sometimes the hour.
Quick trivia question: the
title of this blog entry is a play on dialogue from a 70’s film with a Twilight
Zone connection. Name the film and
explain the connection, and you might just win a prize.
2 comments:
God's lonely man/Taxi Driver/Bernard Herrmann. Don't need a prize. The fact that you are starting to feel better is prize enough.
Right you are, old friend. Has it been long enough to call you that? Tempus fugit....
No prize? Bah!
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